best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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