make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
