Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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