He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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