Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize