so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
