bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
