We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
