So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
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so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
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Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?