Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
