I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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