you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
