y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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