I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
