Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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