we should wear snuggies to the strip club
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
