Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
