mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
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cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
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No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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