i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
