I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize