His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize