Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize
