Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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