i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
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How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
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I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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