I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Randomize
