Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Be still, my beating vagina.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
