he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
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