i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
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