At least make sure they are 18
Why
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
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