Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
