It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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