Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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