So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
