hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
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So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
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We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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