Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
