We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
there is puke in my bra ... again
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
