I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
