Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in