Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize