Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
My Higher Power is John Stamos
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
