I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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