He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
