sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize