I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This baby is an asshole
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize