she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
It's just like the Real World with babies
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
