Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I party with great urgency now.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
