STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
