Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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