ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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