There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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