Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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